.....destined for greatness
'Twas not always so..... I had bought the temptation. I wanted to be somebody...... somebody important! Our little bookstore started in a little 400 square foot office on the second floor of a real estate office. We expanded into the 200 square foot office next door. Then a guy came in and handed me a check for 20 grand and I bought the building in the middle of town between the bank and the post office. We put the bookstore in one of the 3000 square foot store fronts, rented the other 3000 foot storefront to an auto parts store, as well as the four 6-room apartments above them. I mean I was really becoming a somebody.
I was a do-er .... we cut a huge stairway in the middle of the bookstore and opened up another 3000 square feet of bookstore in the basement..... eventually cutting thru underneath the auto parts store with another 3000 feet. I don't think there was another 9000 Christian Bookstore on the East Coast. I mean I was really, really becoming a somebody.
When Pat Robertson wanted to put his 700 Club TV program on the air in the metropolitan New York City area, his guy was asking everywhere who would the guy be to talk to about making something happen quickly in the area...... everywhere he asked, he heard that Phil Wolff was the guy who gets things done. I put 20 phone booths in the basement of the bookstore, trained 100 telephone counselors and we got it done....thousands of phone calls every week.....I mean I was really, really, really becoming a somebody!
Ah....yes..... destined for greatness. Great temptation. I kept working my way thru that bushel of apples..... had my own radio program, was an officer in the Full Gospel Business Mens Fellowship, became a troubleshooter for CBN's other regional counseling centers, trained their other area directors in the system I created to follow-up with the people calling in during the broadcasts, set up a net-work of 250 local churches to handle all the referrals we were getting from the folks calling in..... man oh man, I tell you....think Tom Cruise in Top Gun.... that was the great Phil Wolff..... best of the best.... doer of the doers!
That beast has to die in us.
25 years later..... God speaks to this burnt out wreck painting his picket fence...... there I am crying out to Him with my "I don't get it Lord, all I ever wanted to do was serve you.... and look at me...depressed, rejected, totally useless to you or anybody else......." I was having a very serious pity party. The Lord responded.... very gently.... "Philip....I never asked you to do anything for me....all I ever wanted was a relationship with you."
So much for doing. So much for the doer of the doers. Now I just want to know Him a little better every day..... and I do.