Over and over and over... just kept happening ....after the perfect church fell apart... my purpose in life kept changing... I had to keep reinventing it... or go down the tubes... how come is it you think?.... could it possibly be that .... "that whole built-in concept was a lie… right from the beginning… a lie…"   like I was saying the other day... that thing about our purpose in life is to accomplish great and marvelous things... have some great ministry for God ... save the world... do something really significant  and important... could it be a lie?   Yes... it could... it is.  It is a very big lie.

One disaster after another.... the restaurant  followed the church mess... of course that had  to be the plan from the beginning... duh... 8 years later I was begging the Lord to shut it down... in between... two attempts to start another church... this time I would get it right....   :)

Then taking the call to pastor a small congregational church... it took two years to finally see that wasn't going anywhere either... then the move to Morrisville... of course... this was it... sorry Philip.... no it wasn't... I was now a totally rejected... totally useless... totally depressed ... totally burned out mess...

How come is it  I needed to get to this point in order to see it?.... in order to see  it has absolutely nothing to do with anything we do... anything we accomplish or don't accomplish... our purpose  in life has nothing to do with doing... it has to do with being... simply being in a relationship with God... being who we are where we are... and being there with Him.....just like He told me that day at the fence...

"Philip... I never asked you to do anything for me... all I ever wanted was a relationship with you."

Nothing can be that simple... can it....

:)