Amazing what I used to think it meant to be double minded... I was taught that when I asked God for something I had to do it in "faith" believing and then I would get what I asked for... but... if I let a little doubt creep in there... God would not give me what I asked for...

"the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind. For that man ought not to expect that he will receive anything from the Lord. He is a double minded man, unstable in all his ways."

You see... when I was a little kid... playing in the sand box for 30 years... I just kept asking the Lord for stuff for me... some toys to play with... an ice cream cone... give me this Lord... give me that Lord... get me out of my latest mess, Lord... bless me Lord... heal me... set me free... hey Lord,how about this one... I would just love to be Philip the flaming evangelist, Lord... bless that... bring it to pass...

That's what it's like when I get born again... born a second time... born a spiritual man... I get a second mind... a spiritual mind... and that mind is at war with my natural mind... two minds... I can be double minded...

My spiritual mind has only one desire... one thing it asks for... "Lord,  I just want what you want..." ...simple... solid as a rock... there is no doubting in that... I am single minded and stable... no problem until my natural mind kicks in and says...  "Philip, you certainly don't want to go there... this is what you really want... now don't let any doubt in there or God won't do it for you..." 

and the battle begins... the sea roars... I am driven and tossed....

hmmmm...